I see you walking, then you walk by!
You wink at me as I begin to smile.

You look so Hot in your tight summer dress.
I think of candy, the kind that I lick.
You know the ones that come as a stick.

You taste sweet, somehow I can tell.
It’s just Imagination, as it swells.

You keep on walking, but I’m glad that we met.
Your so lovely, I will never forget.

I see you walking, then you walk by.
You wink at me as I begin to smile.

Do, Do, Do, Do,
Hm, Hm, Hm, Hmm!

Yeah, I’ve been there too, man. Writing a poem about a stranger I saw in the park, and I can’t think of any good rhyming phrases so I just use the first words that come to mind, which result in inane references to sticked-candy and “swells”. Also: is your imagination swelling, or something else? The writing is not clear. D-, see me after class.

It was about 2:00 in the morning on the night of July fourth. I was a blonde guy wearing a blue t-shirt with jeans and white sneakers. You were a white girl with shoulder-length brown hair and was wearing a lovely sun dress that was sort of a cream color. As soon as I got off the train you slapped me as hard as you could across the left side of my face for no reason. I would like to meet you again and buy you a coffee.

Huh. Well. So he got off the train and she was just standing there, and then she slapped him? Is that what happened? Could have mistaken him for someone else, I suppose… but what I am wondering is what this gentleman did afterwards. Stare slack-jawed as she pranced away? I wish I knew the rest of this story.

WOW YOU WERE HOT!!
i was in a White mini van
i nodded a few times and when forced to pass i yelled WOOOF
u looked like u liked it
hit me back if you did!
i think your licence was [redacted]
WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF

55:35w north, silver toyota corolla with blue ribbon – m4w – 21

You drove a silver toyota corolla with a blue ribbon magnet on the trunk. You were blonde and had your hair up. I just wanted to see if you were single and interested in going out on the town. let me know

And:

silver olds. alero yankee doodle rd and pilot knobb – m4w – 21

You were driving a silver oldsmobile alero down yankee doodle rd. and I was on pilot knobb waiting to turn. You were wearing sunglasses, and i was too. You obviously checked me out and i obviously liked it.

Yeah, okay, buddy. I’ll let you know.

Last night, around 7 — the intersection sounds nasty but it’s real.
You: deep pink skirt, white shirt, gorgeous locks, walking with two lady friends.
Me: GL white dude in standard-issue blue shirt and eyes locked on you.
Let’s connect and do something serious.

I wish I knew what “GL” stood for. “Gay-looking”, perhaps.

We spent an amazing weekend together; it was probably the greatest birthday gift ever but now you have dropped off the face of the planet!? I guess it’s safe of me to assume that every thing I witnessed over the weekend is probably what I thought it was. I wish you the best and it’s a shame that it was all a facade.

Please regard the title. Is “Matthew” a common, or even occasional, name for a woman? What is going on here?

Update: My comment on that post brought in almost 90 new visitors.  Many thanks to you all!

This is quite a long-shot here. My lady-friend and I spotted you, a tall, be-speckled, sandy-haired fellow sitting up front, alone in a grey or tan t-shirt and track pants. After seeing Up (incredible, by the way) we got in our own Spirit of Adventure and quickly followed you into the parking area to my car–you were in a hurry. Your car was greenish. I almost fell over when I spotted the HRC = sticker on yr bumper–SCORE! Feeling inspired by the movie, we followed in hot pursuit. We got as far as 35W when we were cut off by a mini-van and lost the scent. CURSES! Me: tall, blonde crazy hair and a brown facial hair, green and white t-shirt and pin-stripe pants. Maybe it’s better the trail went cold, I can’t really imagine what would’ve happened if we followed you home. You’re a handsome gent and if you ever want to see a movie with a partner consider this an invite!

you were surreptitiously lurking at me thursday. it was undeniably appealing; however, if you’re going to give me the sex eye all night, grow some fucking balls & ask me on a date. it’s not that hard. it’s called life. get to know it.
ps. i like picnics.

I want to be at that picnic.

You co-taught a class about a year ago as an adjunct. I wanted to speak to you further but I had nothing to say. You’ve published countless articles, given numerous presentations, chaired multiple committees, been awarded prestigious honors and degrees. I have achieved nothing by comparison. And yet, of all the people I met at that lonely place, you were the first person to say a kind word to me, to share a laugh and a smile. You gave me your card but I never had the nerve to call. After all, what would I say? Someone like you would not remember someone like me now.

I was too embarrassed to let myself admit that I wanted to keep in touch. I now realize that I made a mistake.

So, if you see this, I want to let you know that you were a much-needed bright spot. Your gesture of friendliness has not been forgotten.

Thank you.